NOTES

AIRPLANES

"Speed Checked by Aircraft"

I don't believe it, and until I'm pulled over by an airplane, I never will.

PAINTERS

"Why do painters wear white?"

RYAN: "So they can test the color of the paint on themselves."

ANDREW: "Because they're outside, and the white clothes keep them cool."

KEVIN: "I actually paint naked."

NICK: "They wear white so they know when they get paint on them.  That way they don't rub up against anything. I painted for years but never wore white."

JOHN: "I think painters wear white (like chefs and cooks) to symbolize cleanliness and neutrality.  But do you really care what color the people that are painting your house are wearing?"

OWEN: "So at the end of the day, they can evaluate how much paint they are wasting."

ANSWER: Traditionally, most paint used by house painters was some shade of white. The wearing of white is simply because it does not contrast and show the paint drops and splatters that are part of the day's work. Blue Jean painters look pretty sloppy after a few days of painting and are less likely to be hired.

LEARN HOW TO:

Tie a neck tie (done, check).

Efficiently eat a grapefruit.

Have adult looking cursive.

Snap my fingers on my right hand.

Teach my older brother how to whistle.

Fix my car.

GOLF

Golfers have a water hazard: perhaps include a fire hazard.  No penalty stroke if you can get your ball out.  Also include a biohazard.  Replace the sand trap with a bear trap.

THE BOBBER

I'm excited to say that Riverside Inn of Side Lake, MN, has named a sandwich after me.

The Bobber:  Peanut butter and sliced cucumber on your choice of toasted white or wheat bread cut diagonally, served with tortilla chips and a gin and tonic.